The breathing problems from last night only escalated today. I can barely breathe.
Perhaps this is the start of a nasty cold, but whatever it is, I want it to go away as fast as possible.
My lungs are KILLING me!
I’m literally gasping for every breath, and I’ve toyed with buying an inhaler, or going to the doctor.
My body (lungs, most specifically) seems to be expelling the toxins left and right, making me cough every 30 seconds or so.
It’s really painful.
I can’t sleep.
Last night I had to sit up to make myself feel comfortable, because as soon as I would lie down flat on my bed, the pressure was just too much for my lungs and I would cough endlessly.
I got like 2 or 3 hours of sleep, at best.
Am I craving a cigarette?
Absolutely not! It’s the furthest thing from my mind, as I can barely breathe to begin with.
If I did want to smoke (and I don’t) where would the smoke go? Not into my lungs, because I feel there is no room right now, as they are so swollen.
One thing I do want to say is that I don’t remember ever having illnesses impact my lungs so much.
As a smoker for 18 years, as I grew older, whenever I would get sick, it always started in my lungs.
That never happened to me as a child.
I never had breathing problems associated with a cold or flu. But now it seems to be the case 100% of the time.
Is it because of smoking? I think so.
Seriously, I can’t even imagine smoking right now.
I was miserable, and hated myself and my life, every single day.
Despite my newly acquired cold, my life is awesome now. It’s not centered around the bar scene, or smoking as much as I possibly could, or wasting all my money.
Now I try to make each day the best it can possibly be.
Withdrawal is a crazy roller coaster, I must admit. Looking back on previous days, it seems to be up and down and up and down.
Who knows what tomorrow will be like?
Although the entire process of quitting can be (and is) extremely painful, it’s definitely worth it in the end.
Would I be sick right now if I were still a smoker? Would I be even more sick? Yes, I think so.
I’m having an awful time right now, but if I was still smoking, it would be twice as bad. I might even be at the hospital, who knows.
I do know, from experience, that sicknesses last much shorter as a non-smoker than when you’re a smoker.
Can you relate?
Their body is trying to expel all the junk that is trapped inside their lungs, and oftentimes are susceptible to illness.
Cigarettes harm your immune system, so when that’s down, you’re vulnerable to becoming ill.
That’s why smokers get sick more often.
Hopefully tomorrow this moves from my lungs to somewhere else, as it is really painful to be coughing non-stop the entire night.
I don’t even know if I’ll be able to sleep, that’s how bad it is.
Luckily, I have tomorrow off.
I can’t wait until the day when I no longer physically depend on stupid cancer sticks, or mentally give them one ounce of thought.
They have taken 18 years of my life, and I want it back. I want it all back.
I want to be the real ME, and I’m going to get there, no matter what it takes.
I’m tired of it.