Today actually started out great!
Had a good night’s rest, got plenty of sleep, didn’t immediately crave a cigarette when I woke up, and made a nice breakfast for myself.
I didn’t have any allergies, either.
There were a few moments of physical pain, but they came and went quickly.
I truly thought, “You know, I think the worst is behind me!”
I worked a double-shift, and it was a really busy night. I work at 2 restaurants, both serving and bartending.
But it was a crazy, busy day, and it never let up.
I only received a small break between shifts, and the constant running back and forth kept going the entire time.
I was exhausted, and quite frustrated that it never seemed to end.
I was getting angry and upset.
I started to think, “I could sure go for a cigarette right now. I might have one when I get off. It’s my fault for working in such a crazy place. It’s too hard and too stressful.”
That’s exactly what played in my mind on a constant loop for a couple hours tonight.
I was ready to give it all up, because of a few busy hours at work.
Luckily, I have a long walk home so I can re-evaluate my thoughts and think about my situation.
Once you’re out of the crazy work environment, it’s a whole other story. It’s easier to get through once you’re out in the fresh air, away from drama.
But that’s not the end of it.
On my walk home, my friend (who just so happens to be a smoker) called me.
The mere sound of her voice brought back tons of flashbacks to us puffing away while having a great time with whatever we were doing.
I specifically remember the cravings coming on real strong during our conversation. It’s because the last time I talked to her, I was a smoker.
She’s a huge trigger.
It was hard to mentally get away from this.
My friend said she was coming to visit in about a month, so my mind was convincing me to smoke until she gets here, because once we hangout, we’ll both be smoking together anyways.
That’s what Day 4 is like.
It tried convincing me that I might as well continue until my friend comes to visit, and then after that I can quit.
It’s always after an “event.”
It always says to wait until the next major event, and then stop after that because it will be easier.
That’s an absolute lie, because quitting is never easy.
It’s impossible that I’d remain that way for another month until my friend arrives.
So would it have been worth it to smoke for just a few hours (because of the intense cravings) only to quit tomorrow and start all the way over at square one? Absolutely not!
I’m so glad I didn’t give in tonight.
It was tough, and there were plenty of moments I wanted to give up and surrender to my addiction, but in the end, I managed to succeed.
That’s what you call “letting your guard down.”
I definitely let my guard down this morning. I wasn’t prepared AT ALL for the stressful night ahead of me.
I wasn’t mentally prepared for that phone call, either. That was a nail biter in itself.
Day 4: Woke up no cravings, slept alright. Took my mother out to lunch and to a few stores. Holy crap, I felt like an empty vessel trying not to lose it and break down. Anxiety and depression took me today and my mask/patience was thin. I didn’t want a cig, I wanted to cry. I got a constant shooting pain in my back for 10-30 mins that almost brings me to my knees. I will not give up but I’m struggling over here…
Was struggling with today. So glad I found this site and to realize I was not alone.
Day 4 and it is only 1:30pm…. I am struggling to concentrate, my body aches, I assume from being so tense? Pretty sure the devil came out of my throat at my husband. He did tick me off, but the devil voice even scared myself. I have so much work to do and cannot seem to stay on task, working from home that is the last thing you want. My official quit date (that myself and doctor came up with) is 10 days away, but I woke up 4 days ago and thought wth. Part of me regrets that choice, the other part is unwilling to start this process over. I smoked for 8 years, quit for 7, picked it back up after my divorce, which was 12 years ago. 20 years of smoking, I am done. I don’t remember it being so PAINFUL the first time I quit. I started with trying to log my food, I have since tossed that. I cannot do both right now. Quiting the cancer sticks is priority #1, being fatty patty will be my next hurdle. I have the lozenges, but have only had 3 in the past 4 days. I don’t want another crutch. Really hoping tomorrow is better.
Laura Knight says
Day 4 and it began rough and has not let up. Looks like I might be going through the whole gamut again. The first 3 days had me fooled by thinking it was going to be easier this time since I just recently quit for 10 weeks. I’m starting Wellbutrin again in the morning though. I had to take it the last quit because of depression and the anger. I turned into someone nobody recognized, including myself! I am slow to anger, a real pushover actually. But quitting smoking turned me into a stark raving lunatic. And I didn’t care who saw my lunacy! I waited 3 weeks with my last quit before I went to the doctor. I am not waiting this time, and the Wellbutrin works in about 3 days for me. The depression goes away and the anger stops. The anger and depression isn’t an issue yet but I know it will be considering how I’m feeling today. The meds AND this site was what kept me going last time. Mateo you are so awesome to care about everyone successfully quitting and keeping this site active. Everyone here is so grateful to you! For me, I now know it’s going to take longer to get through all this, so I just have to be patient and wait for my breakthrough.
Hi! Thanks for this blog, Mateo. And thanks everyone for sharing your experiences. It’s so encouraging to read other people’s stories and realize I’m not the only one having a hard 4th day.
The day started so well, I felt confident and proud. I prepared a healthy breakfast and gave myself a face-care session, like masks, creams, oils and all these. I even thought that the hardest bit was behind me already…
Not at all..
Early afternoon, I got angry at my boyfriend and shouted at him like a mad woman coz he’d pulled up the handbrake of my car very hard. Then, I went to the supermarket and made horrible thoughts about people, I even felt the urge to shout at a child coz poor thing was blocking my way (-I didn’t, thankfully). Then I got home and started crying, feeling horrible for how I behaved to my boyfriend and the urge to shout at the child.
And that’s when the worst cravings started. I was having self-loathing thoughts, like “I’ll smoke anyway soon coz I’m not good enough to quit, coz I’m rubbish and will never make it, I’ll soon give in..” etc etc..
Well, then I got my laptop to read people’s success stories or watch videos about lung cancer. These two I’ve been doing every time I feel tempted. So, I came across this blog and it has made me feel so much better.
Thank you everyone! Community makes us stronger.
Keep strong. We can do it.
I had smoked from the age of 16. When I was 22, I meet my husband a non smoker, but it didn’t bother him, but before I knew it I didn’t smoke any more. It goes to show who’s company you keep. It was totally painless. Still when we got divorced 14 years later my friend offered me a cigarette and the stupid smoking began again.
Been smoking ever since, thinking it will be as easy as then to give it up. No it isn’t it’s very hard, but I am on day 4 of not smoking. Trying self hypnosis at the moment. Still I am tempted, but haven’t given in. Now I try not to think about it, rather than concentrating on not smoking. Thinking of Smoking or not smoking, keeps it in the forefront of the mind and that’s not where I wanted. I want it as far as possible off my mind.
Day 6 for me. Can’t say I am enjoying giving up smoking. Really tempted today. Good job I have no cigarettes in the house as I am sure I would have smoked one. Instead, I opted for a work out this morning, just to get my mind off it. Looks like a tough day ahead. This craving comes and goes more often than yesterday. Hopefully it gets easier soon.
Day 7 today. Didn’t think of cigarettes at all this morning, which on hindsight surprised me. Still the craving is raising its ugly head right now. So I am drinking a glass of water. Telling myself it’ll be worth it in the end. It’s a mental uphill battle at the moment. Writing about it, sure helps me bring it into the right perspective.
Day 8. Still sticking to my plan, but it’s been the most difficult day so far. Withdrawal symptoms, like headache, coughing up phlegm more than when I was smoking. I guess it’s the lungs cleansing themselves. Feeling restless, sluggish and irritable. Can’t sleep. On the bright side I have saved appx £18 in 8 days.
Going cold turkey is very very difficult, but how bad can it get.? It’s just another hurdle to overcome. I am thinking of buying nicotine lozenges, to stop me from reverting to cigarettes and make it a bit easier on me. Let you know tomorrow how it went.
Day 9. Still missing a smoke, but not quite so much. I am not quite so desperate either. Mind you I have a little helper called Nicotine lozenges. So far I had one of those, which helped, but since there is nicotine in them I try not to become reliant on them, as this would defeat the object of having no nicotine in the bloodstream. Still as there is no smoke involved, my lunges should be clear. Still coughing up residue from 8 days ago.
Day 10 and 11. Been really hard. Still craving for tobacco. Trying to stay occupied. Found myself inhaling someone else’s smoke who walked in front of me. The smell, smelled good to a smoker. The temptation is still there. The withdrawal symptoms have magnified, almost like a cold. Hoping tomorrow is going to be better.
Thank you guys for this blog! I am on Day 4 and I just had tears in my eyes before I found your posts. I am happy to know my feelings are normal, and you all have inspired me to keep pushing through! Not looking forward to Day 5 but Day 5 here I come! Keep going everyone! We can do it!
I’m on day 4 too. I hate everyone and am staying inside. That’s pretty much how I feel.. Don’t feel like myself. Don’t want to talk to anyone.
Mostly bc everyone I talk to around home smokes.. Neighbors etc.. I hate that I can’t not smoke and be happy.. Be myself.
I’m at day 4 too!!!! It’s the worst yet! Until today I’ve felt really proud of myself & finding it manageable…. wow, that feelings gone!!! I am now 63 & smoked since I was 15, didn’t expect it to be easy, but today is ridiculous!!! Tomorrow will be better!!
In the past I’ve not succeeded past day 4, no choice this time medically, smoked solid for 25 years, using Champix, find it helpful apart from really strange dreams and restless sleep or is this the nicotine leaving my body. Good luck to all it really is a hard thing to quit.
Todd Phillips says
Day four finished and not that bad! Still desire one here and there but it is not overpowering. Bronchitis that made we want to quit seems to be going strong but I rarely cough during the day anymore and mostly at 10 minutes after I fall asleep like before. I look forward to going to bed and sleeping all night. Today is not that day. Noticed the constipation kicking in due to no nicotine but a worthwhile trade off. Will start drinking a lot more water. Still drinking and having coffee as only an insane person would quit all three. I mostly just miss going outside. I still can but it makes we want a cig so I avoid for now.
Hey man on day 4 well ending it, soon day 5. Im that insane person that quited coffee cigs and alcohol but only cause i noticed that i hate coffee without cig and alcohol too hahahhaha so yea all 3 bye bye going into day 5 no coffee no nicotine and no alcohol hahahha insane in the membrain
You are taking on a tall order, getting rid of three habits all at once. Wow that’s more than I could do.
Day 4 for me, still coughing out the yuck cravings arnt as intense as day 2 but I been having mood swings and I feel like I’m short temper… one day at a time is the mind state to have
Rachel King says
Hi 🙂 So I sort of accidentally decided to quit smoking, its been a build up of little things.. noticing nicotine stains.. my breathing feeling weak.. thinking how my 16 yr old self would hate the fact that ive smoked for 20 yrs.. things like that..but its a kinda confusing mindset because ive never actually thought or said im quitting smoking.. but im on day 4.. which ive found the hardest so far.. think it took every morsel of will power today to not buy any cigarettes but i knew i would have to start from day one again if i did.. not a great reason lol Im using throw away vape sticks.. cos i dont wanna exchange one bad thing for another.. but im not sure this counts as quitting if im using a vape stick.. anybody have thoughts??
I’m on day 4 as well & im doing surprisingly okay. Thanks for all the comments it’s motivating 🙂 I’ve been a smoker for 10 years and I can’t wait to be free!
Im on day 4 and a ciggie is all i think about. Quiting was a no brainer… Lockdown causing the band and all. I am grateful but omw its harder than i expected. I wanna b free from it and lets hope i have a day 5,6,7 etc…
I am on day 4, well 4 and a half (showed how desperate I am counting the hours). Feeling very tired today. Coughed up some gunge. Although my breathing is better, I am struggling to resist the temptation. So I told myself to wait another couple of hours, then another then another. Hoping that sees me through. It did yesterday and the day before. Sucking on some polo mints, sucking in some air, pretending it’s a cigarette. I know I can do it, by taking my mind off it. Rather then concentrating on not smoking. Roll on day 5.
Day 5 now. Still not smoking. I did day 1, 2,3 and 4. Surely I can last another day. Going for a walk to think of other things and forget for a while about smoking or not. The sun is shining, so I am in luck.
Claudia balazic says
Day 4 here, each day is different. Yesterday I hated the world today I am okay. Today was easier until the late evening came. I just want one just one smoke I can feel the pleasure just by imagining it. If they were here I would smoke but there not.
I still have my morning coffee and all the same routines. I still have a pleasure drink after work. I will not substitute I will be strong cold turkey. But it’s so HARD just one that’s all I need. Cannot wait to day 5 omg let me be smoke free
Up and go says
Hello! Day 4 for me too! Started awesome while I was still in bed, but as the day went by… ufffff, suddenly I was finding quitting stupid, as in “what for? This is stupid I shouldn’t quit, there’s a whole world out there to smoke”… eeeehmmm excuse me??? What is my brain thinking??? Is it just me? I’m pulling through but Im scared this is not just “i want a cig” craving, it’s ” I wanna quit quitting”.. aarrgg. Anyway, cant wait for day 5!! Good job everyone!
Those are just the stupid mind games. Don’t give in!
Up and go says
You are amazing by the way, thank you so much for reading our minds, for struggling with so much class and inside and humor and most of all, for sharing it all and starting this genius blog which most likely will be the missing link I never had before, thats gonna make this time, THE FINAL QUIT. Thank you thank you! It’s only day 5 but I feel the support and warmth 🙂
Thank you! You can do it!
No one likes a quitter except a cigarette quitter. Keep at it your body will thank you for it. I wish it was easier as it is.
Fatal mistakes are to keep cigarettes in your home, by telling yourself, just in case I need one. If anything have nothing there to remind you of smoking, it will make you more vulnerable than you are already.
As the saying goes. Giving up smoking is easy, I have done it many times before! Let this one be your last of the many. I am going for an angry at myself brisk walk now.
I’m on my day 4 and the thing that is the worst for me is the severe heartburn
does anyone know how long this lasts?
Day 3 so far was harder am on day 4
Holding strong but still feeling weak
Today’s my 4th day, I’m ecstatic to begin me again, being free it’s been a struggle now I eat, I will turn that into working out. Place my old adiction for a new one.
I can say I’ve noticed my breathing feels 10xs better, my mood is pretty happy and upbeat. Moody just alittle, when im irritated.
I’ve thought about going to the store, getting a pack of cigs. I talk to myself if u do honestly I would be so upset, to know that I have to start all over again.
With prayers and Love and willpower . I’m going do itt.
Kelly K Rissi says
Day three is almost over for me. It was not as bad as day 2 (that was a freakin’ nightmare)
I am a little afraid of day four but this site helps so much. Thank you and WE can do this!!!!
Day 4 for me I’ve been so scared to leave the house in fear of making a purchase but I’ve been imagining going places doing things like the normal non-smokers I see about town with there smiles… not really craving. I really hate the taste it leaves In my mouth though after four days I can still taste them.
Day 4 and just arrived home from work and am trying to think of how I can get a cigarette. Thank goodness I found this site and now know it’s a common thing for Day 4. Thanks to everyone who has posted.
Here I am at day 4.. its 3 pm and i almost gave up 3 times! My mind playing tricks over and over trying to find a reason for me to smoke again! I hate this feeling, i hate the situation i am in ! Why others are happy without smoking and all I can do is think about smoking??
So yeah, planning to go to sleep early today and wish all this addiction would leave me alone!
I’m right with ya – feeling the same way.
venting, I guess
Day 4 is the pits!!!! Hope it gets better from here!
Today is day 4, easier than day 3 so far. I need to find something to do for the rest of the day to keep my mind off smoking .. physically I feel great but my mind is playing tricks on me
Hey! It’s my 4th day off the cigarettes too …today makes 4 days. It’s quite a thing eh? To finally be doing this and sticking with it.
Am hoping the weeks go by easy and fast and that I reach a place where I cannot bring myself to think about having a smoke again ever.
Good luck to you, too!
I had smoked for 44 years and on day 4 which has been the toughest. Glad I found this Site and seeing that a tough Day 4 seems common. My love/hate relationship with cigs is over!!!!!
I’ve been a full time smoker for 48 years!!! I know how you feel…. day 4 is sooo hard but I’m determined…. praying tomorrow is easier!!!!
Yesterday was my Day 4 and it was miserable from one end of the day to the other. This is usually where I go back to smoking again. I find that day 4,5,6, and 7 are the most vulnerable for me. It is always during that time, I go back. Hubby was supposed to run an errand in the morning and the first thing I thought was as soon as he leaves, I’m running to the store and I’m going to smoke as many as I can before he gets home. (I just hate to see the disappointment on his face when I go back).
But as it turned out, he didn’t have to go anywhere so I was happy that I didn’t go to the store. Later on that day, I got intense cravings and had to pull up all my inner strength to get through it but I’m happy to say I did. I’m a walker and smoking or not, I walk 2 to 3 sometimes 4 miles every day. But now it’s not just for exercise, it gets my mind off the cravings and calms me down.
As far as drinking, wine is my drink of choice but I’m staying well away from it or any other alcohol beverages right now. To me, cigarettes and alcohol go hand in hand and if I have a glass of wine, I will definitely run to the store. So forget that.
Day four – my worst day! I’m trying to rationalize every reason behind having a CIG. I have been for three hours unable to CONCENTRATE on my weekend camping trip i go on tomorrow (because i know i will relapse) due to having a craving that is lasting all night.
Day 1-3 have been so bad with Stomach pangs and moodiness i don’t want to have to do them again so i am here pulling on a fake cig. So i don’t put nicotine back in my body. Stupid cigs!
Today is my day 4….i smoked for 35 years and have Had enough….but today has been the Hardest so far…second guessing my decision…stress level is through the roof.. off work today but started my bachelors program a week ago And it is all accelerated classes. Papers and reading 30-40 hours a week on top of work…..not giving up but this is really hard.
Day 4 for me as well. Started smoking like 1 year ago almost 2 now, I am trying to stop. It is a busy, stressful day at work. I tell myself, Mayra you deserve one, but no! I am getting the jitters..LOl I want to eat all the time, I want coke. I am doing this for my health, I am too young….. any good tips, other than a patch or vape?
3 days 15 hours 46 mins
I have almost made it through day 4. I spent most of my day in bed and cranky. Today i’m going to try to keep myself busy and motivated. i’m eating a ridiculous amount of food and feel like I will never be ‘full’. I think I need to go get some carrot sticks, or maybe go for a walk when a craving hits instead of shoving food in my mouth. Thank you for creating this blog, I will be following you in the later days of my journey. I have been considering starting a journal so I remember why to never take part in this nasty habit again!
SINCERELY, 4 Days free!
Day 4 for me, started of good, but have had about 4 Cravings already, have a cough, feeling down now. Last 3 days have been good. Ihope this feeling passes soon. I have not given up my coffee or wine, it’s actually hasn’t been too hard. Looking forward to reaching 1 week mark.
Noem Sain says
Kk, is it just me, or is the cough at day 4 brutal? I’m constantly coughing and I keep trying to convince myself that this is my lungs repairing themselves. Good luck!
It’s day 4 for me today, and man, this cough is something else. My throat is all scratchy too. It must be common on day 4.
Day 4 and I am so damn depressed and life is miserable. Gosh! Just literally taking each second at a time.
Well the addiction is trying to make you feel as depressed as possible so you’ll go back. Stay strong! Things absolutely do get better!!
Hi day 4 today and i feel like rubbish but using a vape now and again. It’s a great help but keeping myself busy. Good luck to you all! We can do this keep going!
That was me yesterday on day three…So far day four is going okay. I just cannot focus on work!!!!
It’s sucks ass all of it man, the fog, hazzy outlook shitty fridge raides all of it just keep pushin on tho man!
Maria moran says
This is day 4 for me. It’s not too bad as I’ll be on a plane for the next 4 hours. I’m thinking I’ll have to give up alcohol for the next 30 days as I’m afraid I will relapse if I am out with smokers and drinking.
Today is day 4 for me also. I’m in bed and I’m ready to die if I don’t get a cig. I’m using the patch and it does help but I take it off 2 hrs before I go sleep to help me sleep. But the struggle is real tonight ugh.
Today is day 4 for me. My Day has just started so I haven’t had any cravings so far. My new work schedule is 11:15am to 8pm, but I’ve been coming in at 9:15am for a few hours of overtime the last few days. Being at work all day has kept me occupied and once i’m home, I only had time to get my children and I fed and ready for bed. I am nervous about this weekend since I won’t have work to distract me. I’m trying to think of some things I can do to occupy my time. Maybe I can get out and enjoy the weather since its suppose to be nice outside this weekend.
As far as withdrawal symptoms, I had been experiencing headaches off and on…started on day 3 but they don’t last to long. I’ve also noticed my appetite has picked up. I’m a little nervous about that, but also aware that I can prevent weight gain by exercising; which is something I’ve been putting off for awhile. I guess I can kill 2 birds with 1 stone now!
My kids are super excited and proud of me and that’s an amazing feeling. I don’t want to let them down, so I’m going to do my best not to. Most importantly, I don’t want to let myself down. It’s already been 3 full days…why start over?????
I am on day 4 as well. Started my day somewhere around 4 hours ago. The urge to smoke came multiple times but didn’t last for long. Every now and then … I take a deep breath which gives me a nice feeling. Don’t know the reason for this but it is helping. Yesterday, was like … there is something missing in life. I have the same feelings today.
Todd Phillips says
Nothing like finding that last 1/3 of your lungs you forgot you had!
Yes I know that feeling. I felt unsettled ever since I stopped smoking. Which is 7 days now. I feel my home is not my home just somewhere to pace up and down. Can’t find any inner peace. Right now I could kill for a cigarette, but I haven’t got any at home. Just as well, because I would have smoked one after doing so well for 7 days. Don’t know what to do with my hands.
Day 4 today and I woke up happy and smiley. After the last days of hell (thank god I did not kill anyone!) I am happy. But I am working now and stressed and the craving is getting to me. But I am not going to give in. If I would have to go through the first 3 days again I know I’m not going to quit for a long time. I can do this! You can do this! We can beat it!
It’s day 4 for me, and in 11 hours it will be day 5. I almost caved in and bought a pack and a lighter on the way to work. But I put a piece of nicotine gum in my mouth and that helped tremendously, thank God. I am tired of wasting my money on gum and having to start over. I have been clean from coke for a little over a month. If I can kick the dope then I can stop smoking. I pray that God takes away the cravings. So far so good. I don’t want to give up, I don’t want to be controlled by anything. Wish me luck guys.
coleen gordon says
Hey Kelly, love your honesty it actually gave me the strength I needed to make it thru day 4 ty
Thank you!!! I needed this. I’m also on Day 4 with the patch. Yesterday was terrible I was mean to everyone around me. I’m taking it one day at a time…
Doesn’t say when you quit, how you managing? This is Day 4 of me not smoking and I’m so agitated and I’m eating everything in sight, especially sweet things. I feel like a junkie, which of course I am a nicotine junkie.
It’s been way over a year now. Who cares if you’re eating everything in sight? It’s still better than smoking and relapsing. That desire to eat goes away, don’t think it will last forever. It won’t.
coleen gordon says
Mateo, you are great and congrats on your new life. It is day 4 for me and I am doing all I can to get thru the sudden empty feelings that have been popping in and out all day. Drinking water, chewing gum and swearing some too, crazy but at times I am feeling anxious, excited and agitated all at once ouch grrrr I cannot stand the control this has…going to keep going .
Saleema Smith says
I’m on Day four and same! I keep eating food just for the sake of eating and i get to the point where I ate too much and my stomach is killing me.